The new issue of Classic Rock features a rundown of the 50 Worst Albums Ever. From incomprehensibly awful solo records to ill-advised dabblings with gay disco, it’s a litany of disaster that shows exactly what happens when albums go bad.

Inside the issue you’ll find the likes of Kiss’s Gene Simmons, Queen’s Brian May and Keith Emerson of ELP defending – or, in some cases, apologising for – their actions.

Over the next few days we’ll take a closer look at all 50 of these solid-gold stinkers here on the Classic Rock website.

First up are the most criminal concept albums ever unleashed on the world. Fasten your seat belt, it’s going to be a bumpy ride…

1 Kiss – Music From ‘The Elder’

The Pan-Stik’d rock titans dropped a bollock the size of Jupiter with this bafflingly bad tale of one boy’s standagainst extra-terrestrial invaders. So embarrassing that Ace Frehley left the band soon afterwards. Gene Simmons puts the record straight in the new issue of Classic Rock, but here’s the God Of Thunder’s uber-syrupy ballad A World Without Heroes – closer to Diana Ross than Kiss!
Redeeming Track: Not much to choose from, although at least The Oath kicked something approaching arse.

2 Billy Idol – Cyberpunk

Oh, William, what were you thinking when you recorded this honkingly terrible electro-rock concept album inspired by Neuromancer and ‘the interweb’? If you ever wondered what arena rock would sound like if it was played through an old ZX Spectrum, first single Shock To The System provided the answer: terrible.
Redeeming Track: The Happy Mondays-go-rock cover of the Velvet Underground’s Heroin. If only for comedy value.

3 Jon Anderson – Olias Of Sunhillow

What was the problem with the Yes singer’s 1976 solo album? Was it the hobbits-from-outer space storyline? Was it Anderson’s kettle-whistle voice? Was it the awful cover? Nope, it was the songs. They were shit. Here’s a frankly barmy taster. Warning: contains warbling.
Redeeming Track: Uncharacteristically restrained closer To The Runner.

4 Aerosmith, Alice Cooper, The Bee Gees and more – Sgt Pepper’s Lonely Hearts Club Band: OST

No matter how much you might hate Paul ‘Thumbs Aloft’ McCartney or Ringo ‘Bearded Berk’ Starr, the poor fellas did nothing to deserve this 1977 all-star mugging of The Beatles’ classic album for an equally risible film. Alice Cooper and Peter Frampton lined up alongside the Bee Gees, Paul ‘Just Good Friends’ Nicholas and – oh yes – Frankie Howerd doing When I’m 64.
Redeeming Track: Aerosmith made a decent fist of Come Together, ensuring they emerged from the debacle with their reputation intact.

Now it’s your turn. We want you to tell us the albums you think are worse than the ones on our list. Email your nomination with a few words as to why it’s such a stinker to classicrock@futurenet.com, headed ‘The Real Worst Album Ever’. We’ll print the best suggestions in next month’s issue of Classic Rock.

Come back tomorrow for more on The 50 Worst Albums Ever.

The new issue of Classic Rock, featuring the full list of all 50 albums, is out now.

It’s to be made by independent British author and film maker Seb Hunter. Blabbermouth report that he says of his plans:”I’ve decided to reset it as a kinda post-apocalyptic road movie, but with all the signifies in place and the characters are the same and the general narrative is the same or at least what we know of it. It basically tells the same story and, of course, it’s an old story with a boy on a quest and the story of good and evil”.

Hunter has written to Kiss’ management outlining the plans, in the hope that they will endorse his project.

“We’re not asking for money and we’re not asking for investments. We’re potentially reactivating some long-dead part of their catalogue in an incredible new way. We’re doing it respectfully and we’d love their authorization. I’m hoping they’ll be able to see the potential in it.”

Find out more at www.elderthemovie.com

Doc’s company, McGhee Entertainment, has named Rosato to its European Board Of Directors.

McGhee spent the majority of summer 2011 in Europe while his artists – including Kiss and Vintage Trouble – toured across the Continent.

During his European sojourn McGhee met Rosato, who promotes concerts as a side-passion.

The two discovered they shared a similar vision of the future of the music industry in Europe and began discussing ways to join forces.

McGhee stated: “I immediately recognised Rosato’s innovation in the world of touring and knew we could benefit from an alliance.”

Rosato’s new role will consist of finding strategic partnerships for all of McGhee Entertainment’s artists in Europe.

Lotus produces a range of exotic sports cars, including the Evora, Elise and Exige models.

Classic Rock Live & Global will be a combination worldwide chat and webcast, streamed live from the Roundhouse in London, where the awards take place next week.

Fans and press from around the world will be able to ask their questions in up to 53 different languages using Ortsbo.com’s seamless translation technology while watching a live video stream at www.classicrockliveandglobal.com.

Questions will be asked in any one of Ortsbo.com’s 53 native languages, and then instantly translated into English.  The question is answered in English, and the questioner gets the answer back in their own language.  All viewers can pick any of the 53 languages to view and understand the event.

Part one of this web interactive event will be broadcast from the red carpet at 18:00 London time on November 9 until 19:15.  Later that night, as the awards are presented, the winners and presenters will move to the Ortsbo.com Press area which will be active from 21″15 until approximately 23:30.

With over 32 million monthly unique users spending well over 250 million minutes of engagement each month, Ortsbo.com is proud to announce its first live event outside North America.

An ambassador for the Ortsbo brand, Gene Simmons has praised Ortsbo.com translation technology by stating: “Ortsbo takes a sledgehammer to the Tower of Babel that is modern communication. It connects humanity. We are all one people.”

This is a great way to view and join in all the backstage activities surrounding the Classic Rock Roll Of Honour.

Although not due until next year, it will be called Monster and is the follow-up to 2009’s Sonic Boom.

Among the tracks set to appar are:
Hell Or Hallelujah

Born To Be A Sinner

Out Of This World

Are You Ready?

Wall Of Sound

Find out more at www.kissonline.com

Titled All Systems Go, it was put out in 1988, and was to be the last studio album released by the band. However, Blabbermouth reports that the former Kiss guitarist now says of the record (weirdly referring to himself in the third person):

“Once the recording sessions were under way, it became painfully evident the production, sound and lead vocals were simply poor, lacklustre… All Systems Go was released to Vinnie’s dismay. With a dramatic change in Chrysalis management, Vincent was saddled with a situation he had no belief in. Vincent made the conscious decision in 1988 to disband the ‘group’ after his disenchantment with All Systems Go and with Chrysalis’s new management decision to pander to the ‘music fad’.”

Now he has plans to re-record the album the way it was meant to be, with Robert Fleischman on vocals. He was the singer on the debut, self-titled album from the Vinnie Vincent Invasion.

Vincent had also been embroiled in a domestic assault case. His wife Diane has made allegations that he hit her in the face, threw her to the ground, and dragged her through broken glass following an argument. Read more here.

The collection spans more than 40 years of history both live and offstage. It includes the following:

AC/DC

Aerosmith

Doors

Eric Clapton

Foo Fighters

Guns N’ Roses

Iron Maiden

Jimi Hendrix

Judas Priest

Kiss

Led Zeppelin

Metallica

Motorhead

Nirvana

Ozzy Osbourne

Pink Floyd

Queen

Rolling Stones

Scorpions

Slash

Thin Lizzy

Van Halen

Whitesnake

The Who

All the photos are of the highest possible quality and have been taken by some of the great names in rock photography. And the prices make them bargains. A framed photo costs just £69, while an unframed one is £45. There are 495 prints available for each photo, with every one not only numbered but having the photographer’s name on the back and the story behind the image.

All the info you need is here.

Apart from the ex-Kiss guitarist’s previously announced appearance at Hard Rock Hell V in Prestatyn, north Wales, on Saturday, December 3, you can also see him headlining the following two gigs in the same month:

Thu. 1: Cardiff Coal Exchange

Sun. 4: London Islington O2 Academy

Find out more at www.acefrehley.com

We tell the tale of The Most Dangerous Band In The World, and how a combination of drugs, rifts, hirings and firings brought everything to chaotic crescendo.

Elsewhere in the issue, we have:

Slash
The guitar hero with the hat talks about touring with the family in tow, loving festivals, and looking forward to sharing a stage with Judas Priest at High Voltage.

Grunge Wars
Two decades ago, grunge and hair metal were the two sides in an epic battle. Veterans from both sides recount the events and try to answer the big question: so who won?

The Secret History Of Grunge
Kurt Cobain loved Sammy Hagar, Alice In Chains were once a hair-metal band, Pearl Jam owed it all to Kiss… We look at how grunge could never had have happened without many of the bands that it might have ended up destroying.

Judas Priest
Their 1978 album Stained Class set the template for the NWOBHM and thrash. When it was implicated in the deaths of two young men, it also became one of the most notorious albums in metal.

Marshall Tucker Band
They sold millions, but could never escape the shadow of Skynyrd and the Allmans. Meet the greatest southern rock band you’ve probably never heard of.

Black Country Communion
“This is my first band since Deep Purple. It’s out of this world, I’m back in a rock band, a real rock band.” – Glenn Hughes. With a second album just out, Hughes, Joe Bonamassa, Jason Bonham and Derek Sherinian look back on the journey so far.

Plus:

The Dirt
AC/DC make a nostalgic return to Hammersmith Odeon; Michael Monroe confirmed for High Voltage… Bon Scott’s life story hits to the theatre (darling); Pete Townshend gives his blessing to Roger Daltrey’s Tommy tour… Say hello to JJ Grey & Mofro and Märvel; welcome back Queensrÿche, The Straits and Night Ranger…

Photo Pass
Black Sabbath
“A chummy portrait of an increasingly dysfunctional family,” is how photographer Brian Duffy’s describes his arresting portrait of a decidedly hairy Sabbath taken in 1973.

The Stories Behind The Songs
Blondie
One Way Or Another was the song that took them from the punk clubs of New York to the arenas of the world. But what was its rather unsettling inspiration?

Q&A
Kate Bush
The first lady of art-rock on resurrecting the past, reclusiveness and the royal family.

All this, and there are also reviews of new albums from Status Quo, Eureka Machines, Blondie, Queensrÿche, Stuka Squadron, Eddie Vedder. Reissues from UFO, The Long Ryders, Caravan, R.E.M., The Godfathers, Black Sabbath. DVDs on Deep Purple, The Answer. Books on Keith Richards, Sammy Hagar, Randy Rhoads. Live reviews of Roger Waters, Rush, Urban Voodoo Machine, Jack Bruce and Joe Bonamassa.

All this and a free CD too. That’s value.

Issue 160 of Classic Rock is out right now. You don’t not want to miss it!

The first ever Kiss Kruise: Wild, Wet & Rockin’ sails on October 13 from Miami, Florida and goes over the next five days to Half Moon Cay and Nassau in the Bahamas. Kiss themselves will host the event, which will include music and themed nights.

Find out more at http://www.thekisskruise.com/